Funny Short Quotes

Found 177 quotes in the topic of Funny Short .
[ Page 9 of 9 ]
Bill Maher

"I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder." Bill Maher
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"I’m surprized Hitler didn’t round up the toupee people." Larry David
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Jay Leno

"Here’s something to think about: How come you never see a headline like ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?" Jay Leno
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"A little necrophilia never killed anyone." Author Unknown
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"I miss you like a retard misses the point." Author Unknown
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Steve Martin

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy." Steve Martin
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Steve Martin

"You know what your problem is, it’s that you haven’t seen enough movies – all of life’s riddles are answered in the movies." Steve Martin
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"We declared war on terror, it’s not even a noun, so, good luck." Jon Stewart
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"If a wolf can take down a deer from either flank, does that make him bambidextrous?" Author Unknown
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Theodore Roosevelt
Birth: 1858-10-27 Death: 1919-01-06

"The most successful politician is he who says what the people are thinking most often in the loudest voice."

Theodore Roosevelt became the youngest President in the nation's history, following the assassination of William McKinley. Not quite 43 at the time, he brought progressive reforms to the country and strengthened foreign policy. He considered himself a "steward of the people" and took the stance that a President should do whatever was necessary for the public good, as long as it didn't break an actual law. A hero of the Spanish-American War, Roosevelt greatly expanded the United States role as a world power, often quoting his favorite proverb, "Speak softly and carry a big stick" His ac…



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