Funny People Quotes

Found 33 quotes in the topic of Funny People .
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"There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators." Stephen Wright
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"I installed a skylight in my apartment... The people who live above me are furious!" Stephen Wright
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"Maybe... there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for unlawfully detaining 120 people. Maybe they just got carried away with last year's idea of pre-emptive strikes and thought, 'Let's not wait for an actual crime to occur. Let's get the innocent." Mark Thomas
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British Comedian    Funny    People   

P. J. O'Rourke

"There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one soon." P. J. O'Rourke
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone." Stephen Wright
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Mel Brooks

"We want to get people laughing; we don't want to offend anybody." Mel Brooks
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E. B. White

"When I was a child people simply looked about them and were moderately happy; today they peer beyond the seven seas, bury themselves waist deep in tidings, and by and large what they see and hear makes them unutterably sad." E. B. White
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Tina Fey

"Somewhere around the fifth or seventh grade I figured out that I could ingratiate myself to people by making them laugh. Essentially, I was just trying to make them like me. But after a while it became part of my identity." Tina Fey
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"We're careful not to saturate people." David Brenner
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"Manufacturers are making products kosher to get in on that market, plus more people are looking for kosher." Larry Miller
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"Other people build sketches after taking too many sleeping pills, but I never preferred that method, since I would keep dropping my pencil." Graham Chapman
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Michael Palin

"People are still crazy about Python after twenty-five years, which I find hard to believe." Michael Palin
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Mark Twain
Birth: 1835-11-30 Death: 1910-04-21

"Rail-splitting produced an unparalleled president in Lincoln. But gold hasn't produced even a good A-1 congressman."

Known for his razor sharp wit and ever-present cigar, Mark Twain is one of America's most respected and appreciated humorists. In addition to his classic works, including, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, Twain's satires and folksy tales found their way into the heart's of the American public. For more than a century Twain has delighted young and old with his stories and insights. Often he used his humor to tackle some of society's most delicate matters, including the issue of slavery. Twain was also a noted lecturer and traveler, his book Following the Equator being …



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