Funny People Quotes

Found 33 quotes in the topic of Funny People .
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Mark Twain

"Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest." Mark Twain
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Enthusiasm    Funny    inspirational    Life    Pearls of Wisdom    People    Quote of the Day    Right And Rightness   

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"If I play my cards right, I could bring network wrestling back to TV. Unfortunately, to most people, wrestling is a laughingstock. But fortunately, I'm reaching people who otherwise wouldn't watch it." Andy Kaufman
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Rodney Dangerfield

"I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get." Rodney Dangerfield
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Rodney Dangerfield

"I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people." Rodney Dangerfield
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"Be kind to people on the way up - you'll meet them again on your way down." Jimmy Durante
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"I think people really appreciate clever commercials, as do I. I think they're very entertaining. You just have to wade through all the garbage. That's one of the reasons people watch the Super Bowl. A lot of them watch it to see the commercials and not the actual game." Kevin Nealon
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary." Larry Dixon
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English Comedian    Funny    People   

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"If people can't deal with their problems, they numb themselves a little bit." Kevin Nealon
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down." Jimmy Durante
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Mitch Hedberg

"It's very dangerous to wave to people you don't know because what if they don't have hands? They'll think you're cocky." Mitch Hedberg
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Sarah Silverman

"You have to be able to laugh at yourself. That's what I tell Asian people all the time." Sarah Silverman
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Funny    People   

Marilyn Monroe

"Gee, I never thought I had an effect on people until I was in Korea." Marilyn Monroe
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Funny    People   

Jerry Seinfeld

"A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking." Jerry Seinfeld
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Jay London

"People read me but they don't subscribe." Jay London
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

George Carlin

"I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work." George Carlin
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Lenny Bruce

"The "what should be" never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no "what should be," there is only what is." Lenny Bruce
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Robin Williams

"Gentiles are people who eat mayonnaise for no reason." Robin Williams
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"I just want real reactions. I want people to laugh from the gut, be sad from the gut-or get angry from the gut." Andy Kaufman
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"There are naked people in boots on a mountain top firing guns." Andy Richter
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Joey Adams

"People are still willing to do an honest day's work. The trouble is they want a week's pay for it." Joey Adams
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

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"I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something's wrong with me." Elayne Boosler
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American Comedian    Funny    People   



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John Wayne
Birth: 1907-05-26 Death: 1979-11-06

"There's just sand. There's no fuel for it to burn."

Born Marion Morrison, John Wayne was the son of a pharmacist. Wayne got into acting after becoming a friend of actor Tom Mix who got him a job as a prop man in exchange for football tickets to USC, where Wayne played. He became friends of director John Ford who got him bit parts. He made 70 low-budget B westerns before Ford cast him in Stagecoach, which made him a star. He went on to appear in a string of major motion pictures, including The Alamo, The Green Berets and Fort Apache. He is perhaps best known for his role as Rooster Cogburn in True Grit, which earned him an Oscar.



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