Funny Editor's Pick Quotes

Found 70 quotes in the topic of Funny Editor's Pick .
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"We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public." Bryan White
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American Musician    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day    Short   

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"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you." Author Unknown
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Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

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"Love is like a game of chess: One false move and you're mated." Author Unknown
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Cute    Cute Love    Editor's Pick    Funny    Love    Quote of the Day    Sweet Love   

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"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" Author Unknown
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Cute    Editor's Pick    Funny    Love    Quote of the Day   

Josh Billings

"There are two things in life for which we are never truly prepared: Twins." Josh Billings
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American Comedian    Editor's Pick    Funny    Life    Quote of the Day   

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"Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words mank and ind. What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind." Jack Handy
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Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

Bob Hope

"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it." Bob Hope
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American Comedian    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day    Short   

Mitch Hedberg

"So, I sit at the hotel at night and I think of something that's funny. Or, If the pen is too far away, I have to convince myself that what I thought of wasn't funny." Mitch Hedberg
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Josh Groban

"There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva." Josh Groban
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Erma Bombeck

"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died." Erma Bombeck
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American Journalist    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day    Short   

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"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation." Jean Kerr
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American Playwright    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

Jack Handey

"Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake. That's called Houdini. Love is liking someone a lot. - Deep Thoughts (Saturday Night Live)" Jack Handey
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Cute    Editor's Pick    Funny    Love    Quote of the Day   

Groucho Marx

"Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot." Groucho Marx
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American Comedian    Editor's Pick    Funny    Love    Quote of the Day    Valentine's Day    Women   

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"The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with." Marty Feldman
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Editor's Pick    English Comedian    Funny    Quote of the Day   

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"When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded" Stephen Wright
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Cute    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day    Short   

Oprah Winfrey

"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together." Oprah Winfrey
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Adversity    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day    Short   

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"It takes a long time to grow an old friend." John Leonard
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Australian Poet    Cute    Editor's Pick    Friends Or Friendship    Funny    Quote of the Day   

Joan Rivers

"I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds." Joan Rivers
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American Comedian    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

Dave Barry

"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." Dave Barry
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Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

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"At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual." Patrick Moore
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Age And Aging    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

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"I intend to live forever. So far, so good." Stephen Wright
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American Comedian    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day    Short   

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