Funny Age And Aging Quotes

Found 56 quotes in the topic of Funny Age And Aging .
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Mark Twain

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." Mark Twain
As quoted in Autobiography with Letters (1939) pg. 965 Add Category or Author

Age And Aging    Birthday    Editor's Pick    Funny    Life    Quote of the Day   

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"At my age I do what Mark Twain did. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if I'm not there I carry on as usual." Patrick Moore
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Age And Aging    Editor's Pick    Funny    Quote of the Day   

Kitty Collins

"Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life." Kitty Collins
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny    Life    Quote of the Day   

George Bernard Shaw

"Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children." George Bernard Shaw
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Age And Aging    Children    Funny   

T.S. Eliot

"The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down." T.S. Eliot
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Age And Aging    Birthday    British Author    Funny   

Lucille Ball

"The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age." Lucille Ball
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny   

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"My mother sent me to psychiatrists since the age of four because she didn't think little boys should be sad. When my brother was born, I stared out the window for days. Can you imagine that?" Andy Kaufman
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Age And Aging    American Comedian    Funny   

Oscar Wilde

"The old believe everything; the middle aged suspect everything: the young know everything." Oscar Wilde
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny   

Muhammad Ali

"A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life." Muhammad Ali
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Age And Aging    American Athlete Quotes    Birthday    Funny   

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"Like many women my age, I am 28 years old." Mary Schmich
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Age And Aging    American Journalist    Birthday    Funny   

Benjamin Franklin

"At 20 years of age the will reigns; at 30 the wit; at 40 the judgement." Benjamin Franklin
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny   

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"Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age." Pope XXIII
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny   

Bob Hope

"I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty." Bob Hope
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Age And Aging    American Comedian    Funny   

George Burns

"I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere." George Burns
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Age And Aging    American Comedian    Funny    Short   

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"Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty - they merely move it from their faces into their hearts." Martin Buxbaum
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Age And Aging    Beauty    Birthday    Funny   

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"At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up like a cabbage" John Andrew
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"When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety." Stephen Wright
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny   

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"The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once." Joseph Cossman
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Rodney Dangerfield

"I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table." Rodney Dangerfield
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Age And Aging    American Comedian    Funny   

Jack Benny

"Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter." Jack Benny
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Age And Aging    American Comedian    Birthday    Funny   

Oliver Wendell Holmes

"You make me chuckle when you say that you are no longer young, that you have turned twenty-four. A man is or may be young to after sixty, and not old before eighty." Oliver Wendell Holmes
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Age And Aging    Birthday    Funny   



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Bette Davis
Birth: 1908-04-05 Death: 1989-06-10

"There are new words now that excuse everybody. Give me the good old days of heroes and villains, the people you can bravo or hiss. There was a truth to them that all the slick credulity of today cannot touch."



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