Tina Fey Quotes

Found 27 quotes by Tina Fey .
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Tina Fey

"In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I'm sorry, did I say "scientists"? I meant "Irish people."" — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"An interim government was set up in Afghanistan. It included two women, one of whom was Minister of Women's Affairs. Man, who'd she have to show here ankles to to get that job?" — Tina Fey
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Afghanistan    American Comedian    Funny   

Tina Fey

"Saudi Arabian police arrested seven teenage boys for leering at women. In accordance with Saudi law, the boys will be whipped and the women will be stoned to death." — Tina Fey
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Boys   

Tina Fey

"[Maternity leave is over for Tina Fey of Saturday Night Live. She'll be back behind the Weekend Update anchor desk for this week's episode, her first show since giving birth to daughter Alice on Sept. 10.] I had to get back to work, ... NBC has me under contract; the baby and I have only a verbal agreement." — Tina Fey
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Night   

Tina Fey

"Yeah, it's tough being smart and sexy, too. I have to say, I'm really not that attractive. Until I met my husband, I could not get a date. I promise you it's true. My husband Jeff Richmond saw a diamond in the rough and took me in." — Tina Fey
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American Comedian    Funny   

Tina Fey

"I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math." — Tina Fey
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Jokes   

Tina Fey

"The first time I went to see a Second City show, I was in awe of everything. I just wanted to touch the same stage that Gilda Radner had walked on. It was sacred ground." — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"I became immersed in the cult of improvisation. I was like one of those athletes trying to get into the Olympics. It was all about blind focus. I was so sure that I was doing exactly what I'd been put on this earth to do, and I would have done anything to make it onto that stage." — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"The New York Post quoted Senator Hillary Clinton saying that she would never run for President, declaring "That is not something I'm going to be doing. "Which in Clinton talk means "I will be President in three years."" — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"At the request of the Catholic Church, a three-day sex orgy to be held near Rio de Janeiro was cancelled last Friday. So instead I spent the weekend cleaning my apartment." — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"I was a mostly happy child, though I had a pretty rough puberty. Growing up as a girl is always traumatizing, especially when you have the deadly combination of greasy skin and getting your boobs at ten. But I think it's good to grow up that way. It builds character." — Tina Fey
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Growing Up   

Tina Fey

"A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss." — Tina Fey
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American Comedian    Funny    School   

Tina Fey

"President Bush gave a rousing speech to the United Nations General Assembly. Afterward, in a touching show of support, every foreign dignitary shook hands with the president and smiled warmly as he mispronounced their names." — Tina Fey
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Nations   

Tina Fey

"In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students. There were no survivors." — Tina Fey
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School   

Tina Fey

"Somewhere around the fifth or seventh grade I figured out that I could ingratiate myself to people by making them laugh. Essentially, I was just trying to make them like me. But after a while it became part of my identity." — Tina Fey
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American Comedian    Funny    People   

Tina Fey

"If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the stairs. If you want to make comedy writers laugh, you push an actual old lady down the stairs." — Tina Fey
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American Comedian    Funny    Man   

Tina Fey

"I was the editor of the school newspaper and in drama club and choir, so I was not a popular girl in the traditional sense, but I think I was known for being relatively scathing." — Tina Fey
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American Comedian    Funny   

Tina Fey

"as few as I can." — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"Union" — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"New York, with cigarettes." — Tina Fey
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Tina Fey

"I had to get back to work," — Tina Fey
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Work   

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