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"John "Jack" Abbott, Jr. #2: [the Abbott's are having breakfast together] Gee, Gloria you sure are in a chipper mood today.
Gloria Fisher Abbott #2: Well, I actually have some good news that I'm very excited about but I don't know if you'd all be interested...
Ashley Abbott Carlton: Good news is in short supply these days. What's your news?
John Abbott #2: Ashley's right, What's your news, Gloria?
Gloria Fisher Abbott #2: Ok, then, the news is that my son is engaged to marry Lauren Fenmore and I just couldn't be any more thrilled. There, that's it.
[John, Jack, Phyllis and Ashley all sit and stare at Gloria in silence]
Gloria Fisher Abbott #2: Well, aren't you all going to say anything?"
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Mark Twain
Birth: 1835-11-30 Death: 1910-04-21

"Rail-splitting produced an unparalleled president in Lincoln. But gold hasn't produced even a good A-1 congressman."

Known for his razor sharp wit and ever-present cigar, Mark Twain is one of America's most respected and appreciated humorists. In addition to his classic works, including, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, Twain's satires and folksy tales found their way into the heart's of the American public. For more than a century Twain has delighted young and old with his stories and insights. Often he used his humor to tackle some of society's most delicate matters, including the issue of slavery. Twain was also a noted lecturer and traveler, his book Following the Equator being …



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