Mark Twain

(45 votes)   A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which gives immortality to conversation.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(45 votes)   Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

Mark Twain
American, Author Quotes

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(45 votes)   Nations do not think, they only feel. They get their feelings at second hand through their temperaments, not their brains. A nation can be brought -- by force of circumstances, not argument -- to reconcile itself to any kind of government or religion that can be devised; in time it will fit itself to the required conditions; later it will prefer them and will fiercely fight for them.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(45 votes)   Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(45 votes)   Often, the less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(45 votes)   We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks, if we agree with him.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(44 votes)   'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.

Mark Twain
American, Author Quotes

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(44 votes)   Duties are not performed for duty's sake, but because their neglect would make the man uncomfortable. A man performs but one duty --the duty of contenting his spirit, the duty of making himself agreeable to himself.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(44 votes)   I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- except he purposely shut the eyes of his mind and keep them shut by force.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(44 votes)   My parents were neither very poor nor conspicuously honest.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(44 votes)   The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creatures that cannot.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(44 votes)   The trouble with you Chicago people is that you think you are the best people down here, whereas you are merely the most numerous.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(44 votes)   When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people.

Mark Twain
American, Author Quotes

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(43 votes)   It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

Mark Twain
American, Author Quotes

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(43 votes)   We must annex those people. We can afflict them with our wise and beneficent government. We can introduce the novelty of thieves, all the way up from street-car pickpockets to municipal robbers and Government defaulters, and show them how amusing it is to arrest them and try them and then turn them loose -- some for cash and some for ''political influence.'' We can make them ashamed of their simple and primitive justice. We can make that little bunch of sleepy islands the hottest corner on earth, and array it in the moral splendor of our high and holy civilization. Annexation is what the poor islanders need. ''Shall we to men benighted, the lamp of life deny?''

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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