Mark Twain

(49 votes)   If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(49 votes)   Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(49 votes)   The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, of ungraceful and gilded forms of charitable and unselfish lying.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(49 votes)   There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(49 votes)   We have a criminal jury system which is superior to any in the world; and its efficiency is only marred by the difficulty of finding twelve men every day who don't know anything and can't read.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(48 votes)   A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be lead by the nose.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(48 votes)   Always obey your parents - when they are present.

Mark Twain

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(48 votes)   Evolution is the law of policies: Darwin said it, Socrates endorsed it, Cuvier proved it and established it for all time in his paper on ''The Survival of the Fittest.'' These are illustrious names, this is a mighty doctrine: nothing can ever remove it from its firm base, nothing dissolve it, but evolution.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(48 votes)   It is a good and gentle religion, but inconvenient.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(48 votes)   Let me make the superstitions of a nation and I care not who makes its laws or its songs either.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(48 votes)   Sacred cows make the best hamburger.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(48 votes)   To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(47 votes)   More than once I had seen a noble who had gotten his enemy at a disadvantage stop to pray before cutting his throat.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(47 votes)   You can't pray a lie.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(46 votes)   I am admonished in many ways that time is pushing me inexorably along. I am approaching the threshold of age; in 1977 I shall be 142. This is no time to be flitting about the earth. I must cease from the activities proper to youth and begin to take on the dignities and gravities and inertia proper to that season of honorable senility which is on its way.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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