Mark Twain

(44 votes)   'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.

Mark Twain
American, Author Quotes

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(52 votes)   A baby is an inestimable blessing and bother.

Mark Twain

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(140 votes)   A banker is a fellow who lends his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(42 votes)   A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(41 votes)   A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razor strap. A thin book is useful to stick under a table with a broken caster to steady it. A large, flat atlas can be used to cover a window with a broken pane. And a thick, old-fashioned heavy book with a clasp is the finest thing in the world to throw at a noisy cat.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(49 votes)   A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(65 votes)   A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

Mark Twain

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(39 votes)   A crank is someone with a new idea -- until it catches on.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(76 votes)   A crime persevered in a thousand centuries ceases to be a crime, and becomes a virtue. This is the law of custom, and custom supersedes all other forms of law.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(45 votes)   A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which gives immortality to conversation.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(37 votes)   A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(84 votes)   A joke, even if it be a lame one, is nowhere so keenly relished or quickly applauded as in a murder trial.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(579 votes)   A lie can run around the world six times while the truth is still trying to put on its pants.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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(107 votes)   A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.

Mark Twain
American, Author Quotes

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(257 votes)   A man can seldom -- very, very, seldom -- fight a winning fight against his training; the odds are too heavy.

Mark Twain
1835-1910, American Humorist, Writer

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