Chris Rock

(1539 votes)   You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy,the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America’s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn’t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick, and Colon.

Chris Rock
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(87 votes)   A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.

Chris Rock
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(87 votes)   I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

Chris Rock
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(85 votes)   Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.

Chris Rock
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(84 votes)   Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.

Chris Rock
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(83 votes)   Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

Chris Rock
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(82 votes)   Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.

Chris Rock
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(80 votes)   Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.

Chris Rock
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(80 votes)   George Bush hates midgets.

Chris Rock
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(79 votes)   Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders.

Chris Rock
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(78 votes)   School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.

Chris Rock
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(76 votes)   If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty.

Chris Rock
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(75 votes)   A man is only as faithful as his options.

Chris Rock
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(75 votes)   Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four.

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(73 votes)   I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Chris Rock
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